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forever
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门派:张家港
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 My Worst Nightmare 我的噩梦
My Worst Nightmare 我的噩梦
The thought, "She‘s going to die" kept running through my mind that night.
The first of December, 1998. I had the day off from school and had gone to the movies with some of my friends. I came home a bit later and relaxed for a while in front of the television with my older sister. At about 10 o‘clock, around the time the last 1)sitcom had ended, we heard my Uncle yell out for my sister. 2)Startled, we ran to see what had happened. At that moment, my worst nightmare began.
My mother was sitting semi-conscious on the bathroom floor, unable to speak clearly or to move. When she saw us, she slurred what we interpreted to be, "Go get me some warm water… and socks too…" My sister looked at me as I stood there motionless, unable to draw my attention away from my mother. "Go get the water and socks… and go get a blanket and the sleeping bag too!" She demanded I do it quickly.
Meanwhile, two of my other sisters had run upstairs… one of them called Emergency. She cried something along the lines of, "There‘s something wrong with my mom… I don‘t know!" She sounded not of age twenty, but of an eight year-old child. No one could blame her though. I know I couldn‘t because all I was doing was standing there watching her yell into the phone, sobbing loudly.
"Why me?" I thought this kind of thing only happened to other people. Both of my grandmothers were there when she made the call, but they don‘t understand English, and my Chinese wasn‘t good enough to explain to them what was happening. I could tell though that my maternal grandmother could sense something was wrong. My sister‘s boyfriend, the one that had called Emergency, went outside to wait for the Ambulance. I decided to join him, for fresh air was what I desperately needed.
After what seemed to be an 3)eternity, but probably only 10-20 minutes, the bright and silent ambulance arrived. As two 4)paramedics arrived on the scene, we impatiently 5)escorted them to my mom. They informed us that it was most likely a stroke. A stroke… what‘s that? They hoisted my mother up onto a 6)stretcher, carried her down the narrow hallway leading from the bathroom where everything had occurred, and out the front door. As we sped the whole way to the hospital, all I could remember was asking millions of questions. When we arrived in the seating area, I noticed a small boy with his arm bandaged in a bloodstained cloth. How I wished that it could have been my mother with that bandaged arm instead of lying semi-conscious on the stretcher.
At that moment, one of my sisters interrupted my thoughts and offered me a piece of advice. "When they take her out of the ambulance, don‘t look and don‘t let her see you." Unfortunately, I didn‘t know any better. I watched as they pulled out the stretcher, and I couldn‘t help but to turn away. Turn away the thought that something bad had happened to her. Turn away the thought of losing her. As all of my family members, minus my sister in London, entered through the sliding doors one-by-one, I was greeted not with a simple hello, but a hug.
Amidst all the chaos, I remembered to call my friend. It was about 11 o‘clock at night… what was I going to tell her? It rang and rang and rang and finally her mother answered. She was asleep, as I expected, so I told her mom that I wouldn‘t be going to school the next day because I was sick, therefore, I would be unable to give Melissa a ride. She understood and told me to take care and not to worry. While I was on the phone, my dad arrived and immediately went into the emergency room to be with my mom. I can certainly say that the emergency room was not at all what I expected it to be, nothing like what is shown on television. It was very quiet and peaceful.
Every time the doors to the Emergency swung open I would look in and see her, and then I‘d let out a little sob and run to someone for a hug. My brother came out and told everyone that she was going to be transferred to another hospital, so we filed out and piled into our cars as they put her back into the ambulance. "She‘s going to be okay," was all I heard on the way to the next hospital.
We had been waiting for a while now, when a nurse came into the small family waiting room. "You may see her now, but no more than two at a time please." My dad and one of my eldest sisters went in first. When it was my turn, the only things I could say to her were, "You‘re going to get better really soon. Don‘t worry about me," and one thing that none of us usually say on a daily basis, even though we should… "I love you." I remember repeating that quite a few times. After everyone had gone in to see her, my dad and one of my older sisters said that they would stay the night, so we went back in two-by-two to say our good-byes and to tell her that we‘d be back later in the morning. It was already morning though… 3 or 4 o‘clock in the morning.
When we got home, we all huddled close together on my parent‘s bed. My sisters talked and I listened, and I soaked my tears into the pillow as I tried to fall asleep. We got three, maybe four hours of rest before waking up again. I spent the next two days getting up early, going to the hospital where I spent the day with my mom, and going home late. After awhile however, I decided to go back to school. I returned to many friends and their hugs of support. My friends were there to help me through it.
After two weeks of getting up at 5:30, going to the hospital, then to school and back to the hospital again, the doctors told us she would be transferred once more, but this time to a physical 7)therapist. Her progress during the two weeks was exceptional… miraculous even. She could walk, talk, and sleep without difficulty. The following two weeks, much like the previous two, passed slowly. With each passing day, we cried a little bit less and became more hopeful and thankful.
While I was writing this composition, my sister, the one who had called Emergency many months ago, said to me, "I couldn‘t help crying even though I knew she was going to be fine." Well, I knew exactly how she felt. The doctors had told us that the progress my mother had made in the first two weeks was the equivalent of six months 8)rehabilitation for most people who suffer a stroke. And then on Christmas Eve, I received the greatest present one could ever ask for…
My mother came home that day.
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那天晚上，我的脑海中不停地闪现着这个问题——妈妈要死了！
1998年12月1日，那天学校放假，我先和一些朋友跑去看了场电影。回到家时已经有点晚了，我和大姐一起在悠闲地看电视。十点钟左右，在电视连续剧刚结束的时候，只听到了叔叔的尖叫声，他在叫着我姐姐的名字。我们都被吓了一跳，赶忙跑过去看发生了什么事。在那时，我最恐怖的噩梦开始了。
妈妈跌坐在浴室的地板上，人处在半昏迷状态，不能动弹也不能清晰地说话。她看见我们时，含含糊糊地吐出几个音节，我们依稀猜出她的意思“拿些热水给我，还有袜子．．．．．．” 姐姐看着我，我却站在那里一动不动，注意力根本无法转移开。“去拿热水和袜子来，还有毛毯和睡袋．．．．．．”她吩咐我快点行动。
此时，另外两个姐妹也跑了上楼。其中一个打电话叫救护车，她在电话中带着哭腔喊道，“我妈妈出事了．．．．．．我不知道！”她听起来一点儿都不像是二十多岁的人，倒像个八岁多的孩子。但是没人责怪她。我知道起码我就不能，因为当时我只是站在那里大声地哭，看着她在电话中喊。
“为什么会发生在我身上呢？”我认为这种事情只可能发生在其他人的身上。当姐姐打电话时，奶奶和姥姥都在，但是她们听不懂英文，而我的中文又不行，不可以向她们解释清楚发生的事情。但我还是看得出姥姥意识到了事态的严重性。姐姐的男朋友帮忙打电话叫了救护车，然后跑到了门外去等救护车的到来。我决定也到外面去等，我太需要新鲜空气了。
等待的感觉像是没完没了，在过了10到20分钟左右，一辆白色的救护车悄无声息地开到跟前。两位护理人员到达了现场，我们心急火燎地陪他们到了母亲身边。他们告诉我们说，这很可能是中风。中风．．．．．．那是什么？他们把妈妈抬上了担架，扛着她从狭窄的走廊穿过，从浴室一直抬到了大门口。我们一路赶到了医院，我只记得自己问了无数的问题。当我们来到休息室时，我看到一个手臂上缠着绷带的男孩，绷带还渗着血。我也多么希望妈妈只是手臂受伤啊！我宁愿她手缠绷带也不愿她半昏迷地躺在担架床上。
那时，我的一个姐姐打断了我的沉思，给我一个建议,“当他们把妈妈抬出救护车时，不要看她，也别让她看到你。”不幸的是，我不知道有比这个更好的办法。我看着他们把担架抬了出来，忍不住把头别开，这样我就可以不想妈妈出事的事，也就不会失去她。除了在伦敦的姐姐，所有的亲人都来了。当他们一个个的走进半掩的门时，不是简单地和我打招呼，而是和我拥抱在一起。
在这混乱的情况下，我跟我的朋友打了个电话。那时大约是晚上的11点钟。我该怎么跟她说呢？铃声响了一遍又一遍，终于她的妈妈接了电话。正如我期待的那般，她已经睡着了，于是我跟她妈妈解释说我生病了，明天不能去上课，也就不能顺路送梅丽莎了。她表示理解，并嘱咐我要照顾好自己，不要担心。当我正在打电话时，爸爸赶到了，他立即跑进急救室去陪伴妈妈。急救室是那么安静祥和，跟我想象的很不一样，也跟电视里播的很不一样。
每次急救室的门被推开时，我都能够看见她。一看到她我就忍不住要哭出来，就想和别人拥抱一下。我的哥哥走了出来，跟我们说妈妈要转移到另外一间医院去。所以当妈妈被重新抬进救护车时，我们一个接一个地走了出来，挤进了自己的车。“她一定会没事的，”在往另一间医院的路上我听的都是这一句话。
当一个护士走进那狭小的家属等待室时，我们已经在那等了好一会了。“你们可以去探望她了，每次请不要超过两个人。”爸爸和我的大姐首先走了进去。当轮到我时，我只跟她说了这些，“你很快会康复的！不要担心我。”我还说了句我们平常该说却没有说的话——“妈妈，我爱你！”我记得自己反复说了几次。当我们每一个人都探望了她后，爸爸和一个姐姐说他们将留下来守夜，我们又一对一对地进去跟她说再见，并跟她说明早我们会回来看她。当时天都快亮了，时间是早上的三四点左右。
当我们回到家后，我们都挤到了父母的床上。姐妹们在谈论着，我就在听。我想睡一下，可泪水都把枕头给打湿了。我们大约睡了三到四个小时就又起来了。接下来的两天我都起得很早，然后到医院花一个白天陪伴着妈妈，很晚才回家。过了一段时间后，我决定重新回到学校。我回到了我的朋友中间，他们都拥抱我并支持我。我的朋友们帮着我度过了这个难关。
以下的两个礼拜，我都是早上5：30起床，接着去医院，回学校，又回到医院，这时医生跟我们说，她又要转院了，但这次是到一个物理治疗诊所。她在过去的两个礼拜的恢复得出奇的好，简直是个奇迹。她已经可以毫无困难的走路、说话、入睡。又过了两个礼拜，就如之前的两个礼拜一样的缓慢。随着日子一天天的过去，我们哭泣得越来越少，越来越多的希望和感激之情充满了我们的心田。
当我还在写这篇文章时，我那几个月前打电话叫救护车的姐姐跟我说，“尽管我知道她现在逐渐康复，我还是忍不住想哭。”是的，我很明白她的感觉。医生们告诉我们说，妈妈恢复过程的头两个礼拜相当于其他中风患者休眠时期六个月的效果。在圣诞夜晚上，我得到了这世上一个人能够企求的最好的礼物．．．．．．
妈妈就在那天康复回家了。 |
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君子之过也，如日月之食也，过也，人皆见之；更也，人皆仰之！ |
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